HAPPINESS

Sometimes, I would think about how blessed I am to be where I am at this point of my life. Then, in a blink of an eye, I feel like my world has just broken into a million pieces and I don’t know how to start picking up the fragments. This usually happens when I cannot take control of a particular event occurring in my life. For instance, I have begun job-hunting for about two months now, and I found myself being the saddest person on earth. Though, I have more than enough food to eat every single day, I have enough money to support myself, I live in one of the most luxurious apartment in Manhattan, I have a boyfriend that loves me and, a family who constantly support me. So, why the fuck am I feeling all types of bipolar?

Looking for a job is a lonely, unpredictable process with no rules, no guarantees, no supervision and a huge amount at stake. In a two-month period looking for a job with no positive results, I have been feeling worthless, depressed and I have been asking myself so many questions. Questions that usually lower my self-esteem. For instance, I have graduated from a prestigious university, with good grades topped up with some work experience so why can't I find a job?

Bottom line, I have been sad and angry at the world until recently, I woke up and decided to change my perception of things and decided to be happy. Because I felt like I was losing a part of me, the fun person I was, the smiley face. The moment I've decided to be happy, I have been happy ever since. 

I think happiness is a choice. Happiness starts by taking some active steps. You cannot be happy without deciding to be happy. Happiness starts from within. Nothing around you will ever make you happy if you have not decided so. You cannot rely on anyone to define your happiness or in setting a benchmark to define your happiness. For instance you cannot believe a certain moment of time in the future will make you happy: "when I find a job, I will be happy", "when I have more money, I will be happy", "when I get married, I will be happy", "When I have this and that I will be happy, etc. NO, NO and NO. Happiness starts right now, right here as soon as you decide it. 

"Happiness is a journey, not a destination; happiness is to be found along the way not at the end of the road, for then the journey is over and it's too late. The time for happiness is today not tomorrow." - Paul Dunn

Enrich any experience, absorb it and your brain will follow. Enjoying the little moments that you feel right here, right now will bring you a sense of peace. Most importantly, be thankful for what you have. Gratitude is the key. Keep track of your accomplishments, and the positive things that happen in your life. My advise would be to make a reverse bucket list. Unlike a regular bucket list, a reverse bucket list is a list of all the wonderful experiences you’ve already had. It is meant to reflect in an attempt to stay positive, especially when you’re feeling down. 

Until Next time, 

Cécile